Friday, November 30, 2007

Kanye West + Evel Knievel = dead honkey

Here are a few more things that you might find interesting:

Eliza Dushku's new movie about group sex.

While we're on the topic, researchers at Columbia say that women that don't lose their virginity until their 20s can face sexual disfunction later in life. Those of you who are single, feel free to print the article and take it to your favorite 18 and over club.

Or just go to Chile.

No, it's not bukkake, but Rodney King got shot in the face.

Inmate #1: "whatchu in fo?"
Inmate #2: "robbing a store with a stapler."
Inmate #1: "bend over"

Have a nice day.


Monday, November 26, 2007

Bye Bye Chan

Tech hasn't beat UGA since before I was in law school. Wow. Somebody had to go (although only 6 in a row were on Chan's watch).

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Bye bye Lloyd

Faithful reader Huge would like a debate on who Michigan should hire. Since I'm on vacation in lovely OKC, I'll let this column write itself. Let's hear some suggestions.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Football news

In case you hadn't heard, Patrick Crayton ran his mouth a little after the Giants game. He said "It's kind of about coming into somebody else's house and trying to be the big dog … You urinate a little bit and mark your territory."

Here's an idea whose time is long overdue: Alabama needs a real elephant on the sidelines.

Say you've got a guy with 9 kids by 9 different women. Now suppose you've got him hooked up to a lie detector. Would you only ask about smoking pot? Me neither.

My coach of the week award goes to Utah coach Kyle Whittingham, whose testes must drag the ground. I'd be afraid for my personal safety if I tried going for on onside kick leading 43-0 in PlayStation football, let alone D-1. I think Wyoming coach Joe Glenn showed remarkable restraint by only flipping him the bird.

Have a nice day,

Monday, November 12, 2007

Might as well have put Peterson on the cover of Madden

I haven't said a damn thing about Peterson all season. But when I do, his knee gets hurt. Consider this my final Peterson post.

Of course I got the double whammy - my favorite player gets hurt and it screws my fantasy team in the process. At least Joe Addai had a good game. What's that? Manning threw 6 picks so the running game never got started? Fite's (third person alert) two running backs go down and the Lebowski rolls.

When you feel like I do, there's only one thing that can cure the blues: more cowbell.

Have a nice day,

Atlanta update: this story made me laugh. It also made me think that I won't be investing an a taser.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Mangino was 10-0 once before, then Kobayashi started competing

What to watch this weekend:

Coach Fran is a 19 point dog at Mizzou. Since getting waxed by OU, Aggieland has been buzzing with rumors of a contract buyout. There is no truth to the speculation that they are waiting for coach Callahan to be on the market. I think Tech fans can sympathize with the Aggies - all the A&M fans I work with want them to lose to get rid of their coach. Fortunately for them, it looks like the Aggies will lose this week and to Texas.

Rock, chalk, Jayhawk - the fighting Manginos are going for a 10-0 start this weekend as 6 point favorites at Oklahoma State. This has been a rough week for the Pokes. First they lose to Texas after leading by 21, then their starting linebacker pleads guilty to molesting a 12 year old girl when he was 17. A Kansas win all but assures the Sooners a trip to the Big XII championship game. Even if OSU beats OU, then OU will win the tiebreaker against Texas.

Tech plays Duke. I almost fell asleep just thinking about it.

Congratulations Kuhn. You dropped Pennington and now you're starting Vinny Testaverde. No wonder you're getting 18 points against Ball's terrible team (which, in the interest of full disclosure, I should say handed my beloved Cleveland Steamers their only loss of the year).

I think posting odds on fantasy matchups is one of the most interesting, yet useless, things I've seen in a while.

The WAD faces off against Stats this week. Currently they're both starting two bye week players. Way to care guys. Way to care.

In case you're wondering, and I know you are, here's an update on Wesley Snipes' tax-evasion case.

Don't forget to send me your locks of the week. From the look of things, there's not a single reader of the WAD that should be gambling.

Have a nice day,

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Stats wants a debate

Here's Stats' question of the day:

If Adrian Peterson is statistically the best rookie, but his team sucks, does he deserve rookie of the year over Calvin Johnson, who is taking the Lions places they've never been before, while producing mediocre stats? Perhaps Johnson draws so much attention, thats the reason why the Lions are winning.

Fite's reply, which tries to stir the pot a little:

I agree that AD has the best stats, so I'm just going to look at what CJ has done. Through 8 games, the Lions are averaging 250 passing yards per game (I'm only looking at Kitna, which means I'm leaving out J.T. O'Sullivan's 148 trash time yards). Last year, Kitna averaged 263 yards/game. So with CJ in the lineup, Detroit is averaging fewer passing yards per game.

Kitna also threw 21 TDs last year. He's on pace for 20 this year. Again, no improvement.

Things look even worse for CJ when you compare him to other rookie receivers. Try this link, from CJ is 4th in receptions (behind Dwayne Bowe, James Jones, and GREG OLSON a tight end). CJ's 3rd in yards, behind Bowe and James, and he's tied for 3d with 2 TDs (behind Bowe and MATT SPAETH another TE).

Finally, CJ has fewer catches than his teammate Furrey, who is a white boy from North Iowa. Ouch.

The point is that CJ hasn't improved the Lions stats, and he's not taking them places they haven't been before. The Lions won championships before they were called Super Bowls, so they've been to the top.

Monday, November 05, 2007


The Big XII has been ripped this year. Now they've got three teams in the top 7 of the polls, and 3 of the top 6 in the BCS rankings.

Who's better than the Big XII? Not the Big 11. Ohio State and Michigan are having good seasons, but what about everybody else? Not the SEC. At least they have LSU and Georgia in the top ten, but nobody else is separating themselves from the pack.

I'd have to say that the order goes Big XII, Pac-10, SEC, Big X, ACC, Big East, then Hawaii (included to show Stats that their Sagarin rating is well-earned).

And for any Oklahoma State fans out there - don't you get sick of being up by at least 21 points three of the past five years and losing to Texas?


During the Eagles last night, they showed Jim Cramer (mad money guy) sitting in a box wearing an Eagles jersey. If you want to give me financial advice, you can use crazy sound effects OR wear a jersey. Not both, it's just too much.

Have a nice day,

P.S. The wife and I participated in the Susan G. Komen breast cancer walk on Sunday morning. The first thing that caught my eye was the parking situation: they had lots reserved for "survivors" with other lots for "non-survivors." That's right, the official event maps had spots designated for "non-survivors." There has to be a better phrase.

Anyway, after parking in the non-survivor lot, we boarded a shuttle to the event check-in. At Hooters. Of course they didn't say registration was in the Hooters parking lot, they just gave an address. Did Fite pull out a camera and take a picture? You bet. What a morning.

Friday, November 02, 2007

Hangover Friday

I'm assuming everybody in Atlanta is hungover today. You'd have to get canned to watch a game like that.

My favorite moment was the first play. It's a beautiful night in Atlanta, and the stadium is rocking for a nationally televised game. Rocking so much that the HOME TEAM has to take a timeout before the first offensive play of the game. If that's not good coaching, I don't know what is.

At least you had the benefit of seeing Sean Glennon wearing a Tech jersey. After a great game he rubbed a little salt in the wound saying "that was the jersey of a school I almost went to." Brutal.

Feel free to vent in the comments section, and get your locks in.

If you want something else to discuss, argue this case: If you force a hooker to have sex with you is it rape or theft of services? This judge says you're a thief.

Have a nice day,