Monday, December 18, 2006

Monday Musings

Allow me to set the scene for you as I sit down to write another edition of Monday Musings: I’m laying on the love seat, just got home from the office a half hour ago, scarfed down one of those new Wendy’s jalapeno cheddar burgers, just nervously watched as LT mounted a furious, but ultimately futile, assault on my fantasy football team, and now, I’ve got a freshly packed pinch of pure delight between my gums, and I just started watching “The Great Raid” with Benjamin Bratt. Why am I telling you all this? Well, because it just struck me as a perfect example of a very Wadesque night, and I figured you’d like to know about it. Now that we’ve got that out of the way, shall we muse? I think we shall.

  • Am I the only person that finds T.O.’s admission that he spit on D. Hall hilarious? I mean, if you ever needed proof that he’s certifiably insane, just watch a clip of that interview from the NFL Network…”yea, I spit on him, but he wouldn’t stop talking to me.” Just great stuff. And, at the end of the day, there is nobody that deserves to taste a lugie more than D. Hall.

  • Speaking of the Falcons’ debacle, I’ve got to tell you that some good did come out of Saturday night’s game. I, of course, am referring to the pairing of Deion Sanders and Bryant Gumble in the broadcast booth in the second half (I think Marshall Faulk does a nice job, but I’m so happy he was at the Cheetah until 4 a.m. smoking cigars and getting lap dances Friday night. Okay, I don’t know if that is true, but how else do you lose your voice when you get paid for talking?). For those of you that watch “30 Rock”, you couldn’t possibly have listened to these two going back and forth and not thought of Tracy Morgan’s relationship with the writer in last week’s episode. It was the highest of high comedy. There were moments (i.e. Deion incoherently rambling on about how he just can’t understand why Parcells doesn’t give Marion Barber more carries or something) that I was laughing out loud alone in my living room. I am demanding that the NFL Network keep these guys together. The awkwardness between them could make for the greatest broadcast team of all time. I’m not even kidding.

  • From the seamless transition department…speaking of “30 Rock”, somebody sent me a tremendous birthday message on Friday morning from Alec Baldwin. When I answered my phone and heard the comedic genius of Jack Donaghy on the other end of the line, it made my day. So, if you are the person responsible for it, please let me know so I can properly thank you.

  • Anybody else really excited about “Rocky Balboa”? In case you haven’t heard, Ebert and Roper gave it two thumbs up. Brace yourself, I feel a 2,000 word piece on the Rocky double trilogy coming sometime in the next few days. Call it a hunch.

  • I’m only going to say this one more time: Every NBA GM that isn’t making a play for A.I. should take a long hard look and the mirror and ask themselves why they don’t want to make their team better. And the owners that hired them should be asking themselves why they haven’t picked up the phone and dialed 1-800-THE-WAD yet! Seriously, I would work for half the price of Billy Knight, and I would have the Hawks in the Eastern Conference Finals in THIS YEAR. I’m not even joking about this. Of course, I am the same guy that is absolutely convinced I could whip Oscar De La Hoya’s Latin love song singing ass in a street fight.

  • Can we all agree that LT is the best running back of our generation? Seriously, if you think you can make a convincing argument to the contrary, I would love to hear it.

  • So, with all the talk this past week about Greg Knapp being interested in the Stanford job and Jim Mora apparently having a hard on for the Washington job, I started doing some thinking, and here is what I came up with: How great would it be to watch these two geniuses match wits in a showdown of winless Pac-10 teams? Seriously, we would have a legitimate chance of seeing the first game in college football history without a first down. I would pay good money to see this. By the way, Jim, Delta runs 4 non-stop flights to Seattle a day. I’d be more than happy to throw some Sky Miles your way if you need help getting out there!

  • Alright, that’s all I’ve got for now. I’ve got to get busy tweaking the roster and motivating my players for their big showdown against an inferior team in this week’s Machi Bowl Fantasy Championship Game. I’m pretty sure that Tom Brady will be pumped to add this ring to his collection.