Friday, November 10, 2006

For Informational Purposes Only

We're all sad that the WAD is gone. On the upside, now we might actually get some competent gambling advice. As the WAD's V.P. of Degenerate Advice, Stats has decided to drop a little knowledge. You might as well call your bookie and read this article to him, Stats is 2-0 on the week and it only gets better from here.

Because the WAD is travelling Europe with a hot blonde (aka Bobby Cremins),I'm stepping in to throw out some "you need your head examined if you take this advice" picks. Sorry, but I could only make college picks, because trying to pick a NFL game gives me the same feeling as getting dealt a 16 against a 10. You know you'll have to get ridiculously lucky to win.

GT -13.5 @ UNC
Webster's defines idiocy as "taking Georgia Tech in a must-win game laying double digits on the road against a far inferior opponent" but I don'tcare, UNC couldn't beat the Sigma Chi intramural flag football team. If they played this game 10 times, Tech would win by 15, 20, 25, 14, 7, 3, -7, 24, 17, and 21. So that 10 second analysis concludes Tech has a 70% chance to cover here.

Wyoming @ BYU o47
This game just screams we're going the fuck over. This has got to be the most exciting event in weeks for the people of Provo and Laramie. The only question is, what will be higher, the number of points BYU puts up, or the average number of tickets bought by each family in attendance. Watch the fireworks, take this one to the bank, and celebrate afterward with your favorite non-alcoholic, non-caffeinated beverage.

Utah St @ Nevada -29
If UNC is the Sigma Chi intramural A team, Utah State is the BFD version where everyone gets drunk, dresses up in clown suits, and runs to the car and leaves with 5 minutes left in the game. Nevada with the pistol offense names the score here.

TxTech @ Oklahoma o53
No explanation necessary. This one's a WAD tradition. Though I really think the Red Raiders will score as often as the Oakland Raiders in this one.

FSU -7 vs Wake Forest
I know Wake isn't the typical Wake this year, but it's still Wake at Florida State. Isn't the average spread in this situation over the last 15 years about -37.5? All respect to Wake, but as Cube said, yo betta check yoself befo yo wreck yo self.

Boise @ SJSU o58
Don't look now but SJSU, just a year or two removed from the holding the title of worst team in the nation, is 6-2 and looking to go bowling. I'm not calling an outright win here at home for Tomey's thugs againstBCS-bound Boise (yes, they are), but SJSU can score some points. Boise should score about double or triple that, though, and this one is goin ova.

Hawaii -40 vs La Tech
Yes, another WAC play. If you haven't been staying up until 3 A.M. Eastern time to catch the team formerly known as the Rainbow Warriors (now just Warriors), June Jones and Jerry Glanville's troops have been absolutely thrashing opponents lately, especially on the island. QB Colt Brennan is supposedly a real top NFL prospect, and this team is strong at all positions. La Tech got thrashed in Clemson, and this game could go very similar. Hawaii might throw up 65+ here.

Rutgers +6.5 vs L'Ville
Do you believe in Miracles? How could you not jump on this bandwagon? Louisville coming off a huge win, on the road, against the nastiest D they've played all season.

Wisconsin +1 @ Iowa
Iowa just lost to Northwestern. Enough said. Actually, there is more to be said. They got their ass KICKED byNorthwestern. Ok, move on.

Central Florida +1.5 @ Memphis
Memphis is awful, and UCF has the best coach in college football. Ok, maybe not. The 2nd best coach behind Maryland.

Air Force +11.5 vs ND
Just because betting against ND is so fun. Air Force is pesky enough to keep this one close at home. Hopefully it will be 20 degrees in a snowstorm.

New Mexico State +11.5 @ Fresno State
Fresno State sucks so bad, they'd be ecstatic over a 3 pt victory here. NMSU should throw the ball 50+ times and keep it close.