Monday, May 08, 2006

Monday Musings

I had planned to do something a little different this Monday and offer you a running diary of my viewing of Saturday night's Lakers vs. Suns matchup. Well, two funny things happened: 1) The Lakers played the least inspired basketball I've seen since Tech lost to Maryland in the ACC tournament; and 2) I had 3 doubles by halftime. Needless to say, the idea, while well conceived, feel apart as the night wore on. So, for yet another Monday, you are stuck with the musings from my twisted mind:

  • I want to be very clear about something: Bruce Bowen is not a great defender! Bruce Bowen grabs people and holds on for dear life. He is dirty and a cheater. Bruce Bowen makes John Stockton look clean. Yet, for some reason, referees are petrified to blow the whistle against him, and sportswriters jump on his jock faster than they jump on the halftime buffet. I mean, the lead photo on's NBA page this morning is a picture of Bowen just before he mauls Dirk with the caption "With just two points in the 4th, Dirk played into Bowen's hands." No kidding? It's not hard to play into a guy's hands when they are constantly all over you. In case you hadn't noticed, this infuriates me. It has for years, and I just can't understand how it keeps on happening. I mean, sure Tyron Lue made millions off holding the living hell out of A.I. in the Finals, but I can think of no one that breaks the rules with impunity like Bruce Bowens has for the past five years. All I can figure is that he has incriminating pictures of Czar Stern locked away somewhere.

  • Speaking of infuriating, for those of you that don't live here in Atlanta, you might not quite understand where I'm coming from on this one, but you have to trust me. Atlanta has the worst drivers in America. Where else is it possible to get road rage at 7:45 P.M. on a Sunday night? Let's just say that I almost went Johnny Drama on some guy's windshield with a 9 iron last night. I have no point here other than to rant....

  • Okay, now that's out of my system, let's talk about the Braves. On second thought, being 8 back after one week of May is right in that range where I'm not exactly panicking, but I don't feel like I'm stable enough to talk rationally about things. Suffice it to say that I'm worried, but hopeful. Okay, that's not true...I'm panicked and anything but hopeful. On the bright side, people tell me I'm happiest when I'm miserable, so this season looks like it has a lot of promise!

  • So, I'm watching "Grey's Anatomy" last night, and I keep asking myself, "Do you think Chris O'Donnell has ever contemplated killing Matt Damon?" I think the answer is obviously yes. Without Damon, O'Donnell would have been able to parlay his "Scent of a Woman" success into much bigger things. Unfortunately for him, Damon came along, and he looks like him, is the same age, and is clearly more talented. In other words, the ascension of Damon doomed O'Donnell to a career of lead roles in pieces of crap like "The Bachelor" and cameos on t.v. shows. Certainly not a bad life, but undoubtedly not what he envisioned a decade ago. And yes, these are the types of things I spend a lot of time thinking about. Who are you to judge me?

  • Sometimes something looks so clear in your hindsight that you want to just beat your own ass for not taking advantage on the front end. Yesterday's Pistons/Cavaliers game is one of these examples. You just KNEW the Pistons were going to pummel the Cavs. I'm just kicking myself for not maxing out all my credit cards and filling up an online gambling account to cash in on this. I have no idea what the spread was, but I guarantee you it wasn't more than 27. Opportunities like this don't come along often, and I blew it. Nobody to blame but myself.

  • I've got one more thing to say this morning, and I'm going to do it in all caps so the 13 people reading really get the message. This message is for the folks at ESPN and every other major sports media outlet: I DON'T CARE ABOUT BARRY BONDS HITTING 714 HOMERS. HELL, I DON'T CARE ABOUT BARRY BONDS HITTING 800 HOMERS. PLEASE STOP SHOVING THIS DOWN MY THROAT LIKE THE WNBA. THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO CHANGE MY MIND. PLEASE JUST MAKE HIM GO AWAY!!!!

And, that's what's on my mind this morning!